Carla and Crappy Show: The Meeps, Middles and Mortables Edition

Meep = University of Texas at San Antonio Roadrunners.

Middle = Middle Tennessee State Blue Raiders.

Mortable = A combination of the words “mortal” and “beatable,” coined totally intentionally by Uncle Crappy in this week’s show.

And with that, it’s Week Five of the college football season, and boys and girls, the fun is only just getting started. Carla and Crappy had more fun than most last weekend, as Carla’s MTSU Blue Raiders turned their South Beach vacation into a South Beach beatdown over The U; Crappy should probably be more concerned that OU needed to score 59 to beat an FCS school – but that was waaaaay too much fun to be worrying.

We might be worried, however, about the Big Red Bears, who were handled by Yale at home on Saturday. BREAKING NEWS SINCE THIS WEEK’S SHOW WAS RECORDED: Crappy’s nephew Drew Powell has been cleared to play this weekend at Colgate, so Cornell’s fortunes are sure to take a turn for the better.

After AJ takes us through the G5/Pac-12/Various late-night games, Carla and Crappy find themselves with enough games on their plate that they’re going no-huddle once again.

Friday:

UTSA at Middle Tennessee (7:30 p.m., CBSSN)

Neither Crappy nor Carla, who will attend this game in person, are expecting a letdown for Middle.

Saturday:

No. 4 Michigan at Iowa (Big Nude, Fox)

Maryland made Michigan look totally mortable last week – and Iowa’s defense could do the same.

No. 7 Kentucky at No. 14 Ole Miss (Noon, ESPN)

Kentucky is contending, and John Calipari is nowhere to be found.

Texas Tech at No. 25 Kansas State (Noon, ESPN Plus)

Big wins for both of these teams last weekend, but K-State is built for the long haul.

No. 2 Alabama at Arkansas (3:30, CBS)

Bama’s looked mortable at times this year as well, but will Hoo Pig be the team to knock them off?

No. 9 OK State at No. 16 Baylor (3:30, Fox)

Strength on strength here: ‘Pokes’ Spencer Sanders – and his dozen years of experience – versus the Bears’ tough defense.

No. 22 Wake Forest at No. 23 Florida State (3:30, ABC)

Are the 2022 Seminoles for real? We’re about to find out.

No. 10 NC State at No. 5 Clemson (7:30, ABC)

DJU still doesn’t look like the guy Dabo probably thought he was getting, and even though he’ll be playing at home, he’s going to get a test from the Pack’s defense.

Enjoy this weekend’s Meeps, Middles, mortables and – we hope – many carries for Drew, boys and girls, and we’ll see you back here next week. Cheers, yinz.

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